i can't use what i can't abuse

mascara_stain @ 2007-03-14T09:30:00

2007-03-14T16:31:34Z

THIEVES AND WIVES.

FRIDAY. WOLFSTOCK. DSRT MTN.

Music. Dancing. Dancing. Dancing. = ]

please come. it's so much free.

Now I'm "Exclusive".

2005-08-17T01:58:48Z

Friends Only, Please. Comment To Be Added.

mascara_stain @ 2005-08-15T13:40:00

2005-08-15T20:57:10Z

Give me all the rejected dancers, actresses, and musicians in the world. Give me all of the rejected lovers. Sell me all the ridiculed artists; pawn me the failed writers. Release to me all the victims of Munchausen's.

I'm taking them all in - the true huddled masses yearning to break free. Offer them three squares a day and a citadel of reasoning.

And it is here I form my army.

mascara_stain @ 2005-08-12T23:57:00

2005-08-13T06:38:19Z

Here in girldom you are born with knives in your back and vaselined teeth in your face.

= )

2005-08-11T05:05:36Z

I Lahve Sara G. <3

Fuck.

2005-08-10T17:32:57Z

Hi.

I am a girl. I involuntarily wear boy repellent. I spend all the money I get for clothes on music.

In other news...

jflkasiutyapouijfnksaguaystu8sanfjkasyt8adujglkjshukfytasi8rujapij slhsoufskgnbsjkyt sohfiouaytiunasJfkhksjahygoi asughasiugfiso suuipo skuhfsouitjhiowshy, shit.

Bestest Kid ^

Real Women Have Curves

2005-08-03T19:53:22Z

www.campaignforrealbeauty.com - please visit this site and sign the pledge! Dove is donating One Dollar for each pledge to the Girl Scouts Of America. Go to the website to read more - also here is an article.

Ad campaign tell women to celebrate who they are
By Theresa Howard, USA TODAY - July 8, 2005

NEW YORK — Some health and beauty marketers are trying to send a message about body image that many parents have tried to teach their daughters for years: Be happy with who you are.

Unilever's Dove brand and retailer Bath & Body Works, in a deal with American Girl, are ditching the traditional "aspirational" marketing messages that tell women and girls that if they buy a particular health or beauty product, they can look like the supermodel in the ad.

Instead of images of long locks, longer legs and incredibly lean bodies, the two companies are promoting their products with a message of "real beauty" by encouraging women and girls to celebrate themselves as they are — while using the products, of course.

It's a marketing risk: The "real beauty" ads still need to sell women on the idea that they need these products to become even better.

"Any change in the culture of advertising that allows for a broader definition of beauty and encourages women to be more accepting and comfortable with their natural appearance is a step in the right direction," says psychologist and author Mary Pipher. "But embedded within this is a contradiction. They are still saying you have to use this product to be beautiful."

Pipher — whose seven books include Hunger Pains (about female body image) and Reviving Ophelia (about teen girls' sense of self) adds, however: "It's better than what we've had in the past."

Bath & Body Works is hoping to catch teens and pre-teens before they are immersed in today's celebrity-obsessed culture.

Next month, it launches a line of shampoos and lotions under the licensed brand name "American Girl realbeauty Inside and Out." The retailer hopes to leverage the popularity of the Mattel-owned American Girl brand of historical books, dolls and other merchandise — and its inspirational philosophy.

"If you look at the messages in mass marketing today and TV programs, the emphasis is on outer beauty, cosmetics and extreme makeovers," says Rick Ruffolo, vice president, new ventures for Bath & Body Works. "This is to some degree a counter movement or a coming back to the more traditional values around the whole person."

Unilever has led the way with a global ad effort and Web site (campaignforrealbeauty.com) for its Dove brand. It tries to reach — and reassure — women who might be self-conscious about their bodies.

Print and TV ads in the campaign that just went national in the USA feature candid and confident images of curvy, full-bodied, real women — not traditional models. The ads promote Dove skin products such as Intensive Firming Cream, Intensive Firming Lotion and Firming Body Wash. Containing blends of glycerin, seaweed extract and elastin peptides, they claim to have skin-firming properties and to reduce the appearance of cellulite.

In the ads, the six real women appear in panties and bras in their natural, unretouched glory. Unilever has been using a similar campaign in the United Kingdom.

"We wanted to debunk the stereotypical beauty stereotype that exists. We are recognizing that beauty comes in different sizes, shapes and ages," says Philippe Harousseau, Dove marketing director. Dove recently surveyed 18-to-65-year-olds in 10 countries about perceptions of beauty, and the results "seemed to be incredibly and increasingly narrow," he says.

Seeking to broaden the perception, Unilever used talent scouts to find Shanel Lu, a Maryland manicurist; Stacy Nadeau, a student in Michigan; Sigrid Sutter, an administrative assistant in California; Julie Arko, a kindergarten teacher in North Carolina; Lindsey Stokes, a retail assistant in Maryland; and Gina Crisanti, a Texan working in a Chicago coffee shop.

Crisanti says she was taking out trash at the shop, and when she returned, a scout who had spotted her sold her on trying out by showing her the U.K. campaign.

"When she showed me the U.K. ad, I was taken aback," says Crisanti, 24. "To see real women in all shapes and sizes represented in such an honest way, I thought it was bold and compelling, and I knew I wanted to be part of it.

"Women such as Crisanti, who wears size 6 pants and size 12 for other apparel, also were picked because a scary-skinny model would be hard to take seriously pitching a line of cellulite-reducing products.

"A size 2 supermodel would have been a real challenge in highlighting the benefits of our products," says Harousseau.

While cellulite might not be an issue for pre-teens, body consciousness is starting younger than ever. American Girl realbeauty Inside and Out products, priced from $4 to $12, have inspiring names such as My Way Styling Gel, Full of Hope Soap and Take your Vitamins Daily Body Lotion and include one of 150 motivational sayings, such as, "Real beauty is how you look when you're having fun."

The products will sell in the chain's 1,200 stores, and American Girl will sell them at its two flagship stores and in its magazines.

"Our target is the 8-to-10-year-old on the cusp of adolescence, when the pressure starts to hit," says Therese Kauchak-Maring, senior editor at American Girl and author of the book Real Beauty, out last fall. "These are not just pretty bottles of sweet-smelling lotions. These products help them understand that taking care of yourself and feeling healthy is important."

I know you might roll your eyes at this - but i'm so glad that you exsist

2005-07-31T01:29:05Z

I dug a hole to get to you. I used my bare hands. In this hole is my heart and all of it's veins and all of the occupying blood that would stay in them when i ripped it out. A river runs through this hole, it is of fairytale description. It consists of my saliva and tears, my sweat. Running through it, my monthly blood - my cheap perfume. I dug this hole to get closer to you, and it took me years to recognize i was going no where. I swallowed my pride, my history, i even swallowed heart - everything but the veins. I used the veins as my rope to get out, quite the opposite for what they were intended, and it took me months to finally crawl to the surface - out of my fairytale. I walked back to this house, and it took me weeks to settle in until i was finally there and dealing with it.

As it turns out, you were digging a hole too. Yours met with mine and you filled it with tears for the first time in your life.

You found me and the moment you did you returned my saliva. You said unconditional.

And for once in my life i had no words.

mascara_stain @ 2005-07-25T14:31:00

2005-07-25T21:32:05Z

sexual frustration > relationship.

mascara_stain @ 2005-07-11T14:09:00

2005-07-11T18:10:43Z

Miss Regina Spektor sent this to everyone on her mailing list. I thought it to be appropriate to post. I also can not spell. Regaurdless, here it is... ------------------------------------------------------------ My dear friends, especially my wonderful people in England... I am so saddened that the great city of London has suffered these many losses earlier today. Because i don't own a television i didn't even know about the terrorist acts until i got to NBC to tape a late night show... What a horror to find out... It is surreal to me,that some people can choose for their life's work to be ending other peoples lives...It seems absolutely incomprehensible... London is like another home for me, having lived there during University time, and touring there quite often... I am worried about my friends... I am worried about my strangers, whom i've never met, and who are in pain... And I am worried about a world, which deserves better... and can do better... and mustdo better sometime soon... Another home for me is Israel, which suffers from terrorism mercilessly... When my friends who live there try to explain their state of mind, it is both frightening, and inspiring... The strength, to stay open and hopeful when everything around you is so unpredictable and cruel, is one of the strongest things we have... Please be safe and take care of yourselves and those around you. I feel that it is all of our job to stay open and free and strong in a time which screams for fear, anger, and desperation... All the love i have goes out to the victims and their families, in London, and in the numerous parts of the world that have been victimized by terrorism... and there are many... but there is also a lot of peace in the world too, let's hope for more... with deepest condolences, regina ---------------------------------------------------- Michigan is beautiful. My friends were phenomenal. I am now with my family, they are amazing as well. My Papu (grandpa) died on Saturday, the wake is today and tomorrow is the funeral. (he is not my blood grandfather, he is like my grandfather-in-law, but he's more of a grandfather to me than i ever had.) It has made things go very differently and it's all, for lack of a better term, sad. But we're doing the best we can with it. It was his time. I half miss Arizona, but only due to my red neck family, but they all left last night. There is no culture here and i love it? haha.

If You're Feeling Sinister...

2005-07-07T06:37:46Z

Dear Michigan...

I'll see you soon, prepared for shine or rain.

I love you, Great Lakes State.

-Teal Louise

PS: I'm going to Michigan for 3 weeks. I'll be back the 24th. I wish I could take atleast half of you with me. Until then...

This is Teal George signing off.

but the hungar is still there

2005-07-01T16:09:51Z

It's cold this morning, here in the middle of summer, cold. Her first thought as she wakes up is "I've never woken up next to someone after anything, not after sex, holding, or just being sleepy. Not anything really." She remembers that this morning it's not really cold, her fan is just on high and the AC is at 74. She pulls her comforter up from the foot of the bed and wraps herself in it, forcing herself into it, grabbing her pillow and holding it so close to her she's suffocating it. She's tricking herself into believing that someone is there for her, someone wants to be that close to her. But all she is doing is tricking herself, because regardless if all the people in the world wanted to wake up next to her it doesn't matter. They aren't there now and will never be. Because this girl, to the rest of the world, she is cold and distant, intimidating and passionless. If she doesn't make an effort to show them she is warm and devoted and delicate and zealous, they will never see. Her first impressions are lasting impressions, and it may seem it only hurts her, it's hurting everyone else as well.

so you don't wanna hear about my good day...

2005-06-24T04:45:29Z

I have an advantage over most of you. You're all going to grow up and be great.

I'm going to be stuck with my child-like mentality because I've been saving it for so long up until recent and now am running it through an abnormally thin tube that'll last me for the next twenty-eight years.

I'm going to have this weird, imaginative side you all are losing.

Hah.

Facade > Truth

2005-06-21T06:35:32Z

Dear World,

You flaunt the idea of you being "pure", but are you? You have so many secrets. You don't seem all that real to me. I see through your lies but not far past them. What are you hiding? How do I find it? Where to begin?

Whatever. Thanks for the air and shit.

Respectfully,

T.L.G.

everybody's features have somehow started blending

2005-06-02T04:40:09Z

Her memory is jagged and full of civil war grape-shot; thoughts are this cheap1800's ammunition, she turns this ammo into words being fired by General Robert E. Lee himself. Unable to tell you what she wishes, what she hates, what she needs. Passionless now. She's stuck with this expired mind; it's worn out and useless much like his 5th grade Chuck Taylors. He left them at her house so many years ago, and now it's all she has left. She's jello - but with a back of brick. Tireless - she works, but her heart and mind are dough. The shoes are faded red, scribbled over, holes throughout, sewn and re-sewn. "Why this memento?" Sometimes I catch her walking down the hall in them; her toes stick out at the end. Who was this boy? She's twenty-three now. She's become nothing, just solid shoulders with nothing to give but mindless labor. Regurgitating muddled memories. What makes anyone so impactive?

Livin' it up is a state of mind.

2005-05-27T18:02:18Z

and so the last few days were here and gone...

Science <3

The graceful Miss Fermanis

and she wore a pearl necklace (te-he)

Irish Exchange Boys Can't Take Pictures.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

StuGo = Lahve <3

Benny and Mikey

Ah-hoi Troy. (Boys state = wtf man?)

Barf. ;)

Sooopah KK

hardcore bitch fights.

Eat My Face.

B-Konch - this is how we do.

Oooh - La - La. and the story of Yummy vs. Study.

Kreeeestah: amazon woman.

sexxxhairs.

Awwwwesh. Myerz

tay-ho nah nah na nah - yesh grrrrl...

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

and scene...

The potential you'll be, you'll never see.

2005-05-22T19:33:55Z

She was attracted to his inability to make her sweat, to scream. His inability to make her never want to leave. She was attracted to his disposable persona. She didn't care anything about him. He was boring; he was dumb. He lacked any substance what-so-ever. She liked it, but it made her feel cheap. She knew she could do better. She dragged him along with her because she could useand toy with him, but she got nothing out of it. He was an awful lay and an awful kisser and an awful liar. And, toying with him wasnt as enjoyable as it would seem. She had the one up, something she's not used to. It was all in her head the power over him. She'd confess this through her unspoken words. It's all just in her head. She wanted him to be the one she never wanted to leave. Didn't want him to be a bore. And she didn't know why. All the while all she had to do was go outside and find what she wanted.

All she wants is to be used.

A Passing Feeling,

2005-05-11T05:38:01Z

This is Sara at Coachella; I think she looks beautiful in this picture regaurdless of what she may say.
(Sara, I've never realized until just now how much i love your eyebrows.)
..... i have a thing about eyebrows - leave me alone.

I couldn't not take a picture of this moment. My brother's friends were waiting for him to arrive home from work. Awwe. They look so little.

"Prom", yeah that's right- I was the "man". I like this picture and it's completely staged by your's truely. Also - you can clearly see Claire's, uhm, ass.

Yet another awesomely staged picture. = ) I call it "The Brady Bunch" picture. <3

Coachella - Woah.

Mmm, bass players. Mmmm Classical bass players. hehe. (yeah he's.... blonde.... eh.... haha and yeah the k-os bassist was waaaaay better, but i forgot my camera for the show...and effing weezer... mmmmm bass players <3)

And there you go lovahs, this concludes Random Picture Teal Time

bottle up and explode

2005-05-05T05:22:32Z

I fell out of Alice's wonderland; I was just hoping for some answers. I took a bite right out of the red apple - so much for giving the minority a chance. You never came and touched my lips in that sleep and now i'm fucked. It rained Round-Up today - killed my beanstalk. I'm all out of escape plans and all i've got left are my ruby feet with angel wings and you said they can't save me now.

You said i'm beautiful when i'm battered, that my honest tongue will cuts holes in your soul.

I think I'd complain if I only knew what to say.

Lately I've been feeling so tongue-tied and restricted. I'm doing it to myself, but I'm blaming you.

I've
gone
crazy.

What else is new? they said.

I don't mind at all. you said.

I really just want you to know i'm going to save you. Those drugs you take won't make you feel better. I think I could make you smile.

The Great Pretender

2005-04-22T07:29:55Z

I've been changing my entire life. Every couple weeks since forever i've been changing. Changing into what? It's not that negative change peer pressure haha shit. It's just growth in change, change in growth.

I'm making it sound unwanted. I welcome it. I like the big drastic i'm realizing i'm a lie and a shit changes. I've had a couple of those in this short period of time.

whatever

Thing is, alot of this change, most of it towards my idea of positive, you caused. (you caused some bad stuff too, you don't get off that easy) But once you gave me that starting push i've skyrocketed all on my own. I'm up there with Sir Elton singing about Zero Hour Nine AM and I'm looking out at the big blueberry.

Yeah - i mean skyrockerted.

Although at first it was ugly and i didn't know what to do. I've learned, like i tend to do, and now things are getting clearer. The TV-fuzz-snowblizard-esque blah blah bs is fading more and more. And comfort is growing despite of what my sad part of my mind is telling me - that depressed fuck doesn't know what she's talking about.

Wanna know a secret?

Sometimes. I really don't mind "turquoise" and i get the fuck on with it.
Sometimes. I forget about Mista Mental Health Zoloft Prozac Chemical Structure Ass....meh
Sometimes. I really just actually for real serious yeah go with the flow. (okay, that's a lie)

Sometimes. I like myself.

No thank you no thank You no Thank you no thank you.

2005-04-12T05:14:10Z

“How does it feel to be born?”

It’s scary. And everything is pale yellow and everything was quiet for me but others have told me they heard Piano and the early beginnings of rock’n’roll. In the wee beginnings, we fight to be the winner in the race, and it’s said it’s all so naive. (Which I believe.) Then you go through the motions. Just like puberty. And just when you’re all ready to grow the fuck up, they push you. They crumple you up like deflated balloons and push you out. Some say they don’t want you any more, so they push you out. They lied about not wanting you. It’s a fight, it’s a race to the end, just like at the beginning, except you’re much bigger now, and no competition except the host, she’s pushing you out. She’s the landlord; she doesn’t want you with her anymore. She thinks you need to move out on to better things. Then the pale yellow turns into a burst of light and white and things much bigger than you and things with defined shape and colors and textures are everywhere and you drown in yourself. You drown in big puddles of salty tear duck faucet fluid. You have finally finished just to go through with it all again, but in slow motion after all the birthing stuff is over with. You have to go through the stages all over. And the hardships you’ve just been through don’t mean a thing, and never will to anyone. Not even you. But now the competition is always there. Not just at the beginning, but for the rest of forever. And they turn you inside out and check you up and down. And you’re okay so they give you to the tadpole man. And then its warm and you are in the landlord’s arms. And for this moment everyone is in love with you. And the competition begins here. Right here, right now. You had your fifteen minutes. And that’s it. You won’t remember it. No one ever does.

“How come you remember it?”

I don’t.

“Then who told you?”

No one.

“Then how do you know?”

I don’t know. But you asked, so I gave you my thoughts.

“Thoughts?”

Sometimes, after all that, you give yourself time to think or just be spontaneous. That, friend, was all spontaneity.

“Then isn’t everything just sponityitity…spontan…spontanitieyty?”

This Is For All The Brunettes Who've Gotten Shut-Down

2005-04-08T17:25:07Z

Introducing....

Your fucking class president.

Damn right kids. Damn right.

They claim you'll live over the rainbow.

2005-04-07T07:06:21Z

I know someday he's bound to go away and over the rainbow....

sometimes i forget who i've got. the amazing everyones. my arm-linking-shashay-stepin-yellowbrick-roaders. the drink-up-baby-stay-up-all-nighters.

this is me sighing.

then i've got the ones who i want to fill all these shoes... too many shoes. or just one odd fitting shoe. i cant decide. but i'm pretty sure its just one odd fitting one. where are they? these(this) mysterious shoe-filler(s).

this is me sighing.

Sigh.

I thought i heard you say the sky is falling down.

2005-04-02T06:30:08Z

He's now caught in an octagon-like cycle. Sharper corners. Foreign angles. Repetitive, redundant. He's slowly accepting and warming up to the fact that this is, indeed, a cycle. He told me it's temporary. He's a liar. This is his life, and he's going no where. He's just bumping into jagged corners and bruising himself in his little circle of not-challenging himself, of fucking up again and again. Even the good days are a part of his octagon. They are a set up for the down fall. Down... down... down. Around, bump bump, back and forth, and up again. Rinse and Repeat. The octagon, the end, the beginning.

It's okay. He'll round off the edges some day.

Days Gone By.

2005-03-22T02:57:47Z

Sara and I hung out Saturday morning. I felt that the bond between her and I strengthened that morning. The feeling was real, a bit new to me, and just... it was just good. We just talked, we just listened. I sat in her room with her for a few hours, and I never once got bored, never once did my mind drift; we were just there... being friends. To me, that's a new thing I'm getting into, "just there being friends". I don't feel the need to say anything else - no explanations, it's all right there.

Thank you friend. Thank you.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

During break I ventured up to Sedona, once my camera gets fixed I'm going back. I scoped out a couple places and took some photos with my digital. The scenery up there this time of the year is phenomenal.

okay.... "photobucket" is being mean and giving me the "page can not be displayed" stuff when ever i try to load more... oh well... here's ONE.